Childhood Train Trauma
Who's that man?
Why is he standing near my slippers?
Is he going to steal our luggage?
We're the only ones who haven't chained our bags
I told ma the biggest bag should be near the outside
Am i the only one awake?
Are my slippers still there?
Everyone knows my mum has 'hidden' her handbag under her head like a pillow.
What if someone puts their hands through the bars in the window?
Who would want 'chaiyaaa' at 3am?
There's a mad beggar lurking by the window.
That man is staring at me.
Is he thinking dirty thoughts?
Yuck
Asshole
Let me hide under my sheet
But then how will i know if someone is going to steal our luggage
Why am i the only one awake?
I am the family nightwatchman.
i want to do susu
hold it
but its coming
i'm not going alone
psst, wake up
come to the loo with me
ufff
get off the bearth and land in your chappals
eeee cockroach
shhhh you'll wake the train
evil men
with big south indian mustaches and checked lungis
lurk by the dim light outside the loo
they smoke smelly cigarettes
they hang out of the door of the fast moving train
their lungis hitched up like skirts
they pretend not to look at us.
we put on brave faces
hard city faces
huh! we maybe girls
but we're not scared of evil smoking men
in checked lungis
In the loo,
gather your clothes
don't let anything touch anything
hold your breath
pee
tie your pajama
don't let the bottom touch the floor
kick the door with your feet
wash the tap and then shut it
yuck
In the morning
Don't take biscuits from that sweet grey haired aunty
She may be part of the biscuit gang
They drug you and steal your gold
the poster says so
I told mama not to wear her chain
but she hides it like she hides her bag
everyone knows its there
oh no
now that noisy group of men are playing cards
i can smell alcohol
there is a fine of 1000 rs if you drink on the train
or you can go to jail for 1 year
the poster says so
aha
the railway cop is doing his rounds
we'll be safe now
oh
oh no
he's sitting down to play with them
now i'm the family policeman
oh god
now my mum wants to buy omlettes from the station
don't get off the train
no i dont want an omlette
no i don't care if it's fresh and hot
mum the train doesn't stop for long
where'd she go?
can you see her from the window?
there's a crowd at the omlettewala
she's going to miss the train
oh no
the train hooted its warning hoot
mummmy!
everyone is running back
can you see her?
oh no! its started
oh god
where is she
is she on the platform?
no she's not in the corridor
oh god
should we pull the chain?
how much time should we wait before we pull it?
tick tick one
tick tick two
tick tick - my potty is coming
ok i see her
god
thank god
the omlettes are yummy
bombay is coming
so is my potty
will i be able to hold on till we get home?
hurry up train
i shouldn't have eaten that omlette
i can't go back to that loo
oho
now all we can see are people doing potty on the tracks
welcome to bombay
try and think of something else
school starts tomorrow
i haven't done my homework
this is making my potty come even more
are you ok?
you're looking sick
whats wrong?
i tell you,
we enter this city and the kids look ill...
lose their colour in a day
lets get on another train and go off again!
nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo.
17 comments:
Fun. Funny. You're a two-in-one, smiley.
w00t!
train loos suck. i hate them.
Train loos' suck. And the men in checked lungis are creeeeeepy. And the luggage is never safe. And those ticketless people who try to squeeze into your seats, so we sit like we are travelling in a local, are most annoying.
But the tomato soup served with two breadsticks and the amul butter wrapped in the silver foil is to die for.
I went to Delhi in June.
I feel for your trauma.
:)
SC
are you sure this is a vivid childhood memory? me thinks its something you experienced much too recently. fact of the matter remains - you still a little girl inside!
write a book... if not for that roaring creativity and talent inside you, then for the cash!...advertising has only given you silly awards.
have a super trip!
anonymous,
who are you?
and these are really childhood memories...haven't done a train trip for a while now (thank god)
sc,
food on the train makes me sick - those trays that slop dal all over the place. gross. i wasn't made for train travel obviously.
pi,
thanks.
:)
Excellent.
:-)
this is something i wish i'd written.
hey citrus,
tks.
byker - as always - am honoured
rishabh bhai so glad u came by.
:)
super duper read.
a sense of deja vu while reading it.
chappals getting kicked under the seat. 3 days of not bathing. thanking whoever invented the indian style loos since western loos really dint appeal to me in a train. mum tucking in the sheets of the berth and me stayin awake the entire night petrified that cockroaches would tumble out from the dark crevices of the berth. a rat running across the compartment[thankfully at the fag end of the journey]. Leaking rooftops.... but train rides r such great fun. They surely are the best!!
super duper read.
a sense of deja vu while reading it.
chappals getting kicked under the seat. 3 days of not bathing. thanking whoever invented the indian style loos since western loos really dint appeal to me in a train. mum tucking in the sheets of the berth and me stayin awake the entire night petrified that cockroaches would tumble out from the dark crevices of the berth. a rat running across the compartment[thankfully at the fag end of the journey]. Leaking rooftops.... but train rides r such great fun. They surely are the best!!
wow, wow, wow, wow, wow. i really loved reading that. incredible, evocoative, transformative. wow.
s
ananya hi
ur right. there's nothing like train trips, no matter how traumatic.
saphire,
its good to have u back and thank u again. maybe you should visit india sometime :)
guess i'm back in the land of the living :)
where is my story?
hmmm.... i love dirty sweaty long train journeys. Masala Dosa and Veg Cutlets and watery Taj Mahal tea.
loved it. loved it. loved it.
: )
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